The Way Sisters Should Be
by Aislinn Carter
Summary: Phoebe Janeway thought her sister was dead...then she finds that Kathryn is alive, but so far away she may as well be dead.For seven years,Phoebe and her mother try to cope with Kathryn's loss, until the day she comes home to a family who never forgot her


Author Notes: It always bothered me that very little was mentioned of Kathryn Janeway's family. We knew she had that drippy fiancé, and we knew of her mother and a sister, but they were never fully explored, in my opinion. I thought once the crew started having real time transmissions with home, that we might see a conversation between Kathryn and her mother and sister. I know if I were gone for seven years, they'd be the first people I would contact. So here's my little attempt to show what the Janeway family went through after Voyager was declared lost. After all, it was the second loss they had to go through because of Starfleet. That had to have been devastating.

I don't own Voyager, I don't own these characters, and I make no money off them at all. But I do consider this carnation of Gretchen and Phoebe to be mine, since I developed them. But just these guys, all the other Grethcen's and Phoebe's beling to whoever wrote them.

I tried to follow the proper canon, and I also followed Christie Golden's Homecoming books because I am fairly fond of them, with one exception. I never bought the fact that Admiral Paris didn't know that Tom and B'Elanna were married. If Kathryn transmitted all the logs in 'Pathfinder', and all the logs thereafter, and considering that she surely would have at least mentioned a wedding and a future birth on her ship, Admiral Paris had to know about it. That's the only fault I can really see in Homecoming, in addition to the lack of J/C.

Please Review! I'd like to write a sequel, but only if people liked it. I would also edit and repost this if anyone has any suggestions about it. Enjoy!

The Way Sisters Should Be

By Aislinn Carter

Phoebe Janeway heard the news through an…old friend, at Starfleet.

"It isn't official yet, but it looks like the Romulans tried to steal a prototype ship. They were apprehended at the edge of the Alpha Quadrant." He raised an eyebrow at his friend. "They say the whole crew was dead, and that it was an EMH who saved the day."

Phoebe laughed. "An EMH? My, but aren't they enterprising little creatures."

"There's something else even more top secret going on, something about the EMH being transmitted from another part of the galaxy. I don't know how reliable that is, because of course The Prometheus already had an EMH on board. I wonder what the Romulans did to its program."

"Paul, I think you need to stop listening to Starfleet gossip." Phoebe rolled her eyes. "Are we still on for tomorrow?"

"I wouldn't miss it." He hesitated. "How're you really doing, Phoebes? How's your mom?"

Phoebe swallowed the ever present lump in her throat. Even though Voyager was officially declared lost fourteen months ago, it still hit her like a phaser blast every time she thought about it. "My mother is strong, although I don't know how. She lost her husband and her daughter to Starfleet. I think she's just glad that my profession is only hazardous if one of my students decides to wield a paintbrush at me." She sighed. "It's been almost four years since I saw my sister, Paul. And yet I always feel like I'm going to walk into our mother's house and see her sitting there stuffing her face with brownies and coffee. I just don't feel her loss. I just feel…like she's on a deep space mission, and she'll be home soon."

"Phoebe…have you talked to anyone?"

"Of course. My mother insisted we go see a counselor about it. But no matter what, I can't shake the feeling that they stopped searching too soon. For all they know, Voyager could have been taken over by Cardassians, and the crew is prisoners in a mining camp or something."

"There would have been some trace of Voyager heading toward Cardassian space, even if it was being towed. Sweetie, we've been through this. Voyager entered the badlands and never came out. Starfleet expended vast resources to find it. You know how highly regarded Kathryn was. They did everything they could to find her. But honey, she's gone."

Phoebe sniffled as a tear rolled down her cheek. She placed her hand on the screen where Paul's cheek was. "I love you honey, but I don't think that is ever going to get through to me. I'll always be waiting for her to come home."

He matched his hand up to her. "I love you too. You're sister was very lucky to have you. I wish there was something…anything that indicated she is alive. I would go get her myself."

"I know you would." She took her hand down and smiled tremulously. "Enough of this though! I've wallowed enough today. Find out more about this EMH and tell me all about it tomorrow. It sounds like an interesting story."

"I will. Love you."

"Love you, too."

The screen flickered back to her screen saver, and she walked away from the console to go sit in her kitchen. She sighed as she saw the stack of brownies her mother had brought by yesterday. "I wish you were here to eat them, Kath." She said to the empty room.

* * *

Phoebe wasn't prepared to accept the loss of her sister. She knew that Kathryn didn't have the safest occupation, but she also stubbornly believed that fate would not be so cruel as to take Kathryn after they had lost Edward Janeway. But even with that belief, when her mother contacted her four years ago in the middle of class, she knew right away that something was wrong.

"Professor Janeway?" her aide stood tentatively in the door to the classroom as Phoebe was lecturing on the neoclassical period.

"Yes, Rowena?" she asked, annoyed at being interrupted.

"You have an important call."

"Who is it?"

Rowena looked uncomfortable. "It's your mother. She says it's urgent."

Phoebe could actually feel her face turn pale. There was only one reason her mother would say it was urgent. She turned to her class. Some of her students were looking at her with concern. "Please refer to the paintings in the text I assigned for today. Refresh yourselves with them, because we'll be going over them when I get back. Excuse me."

She entered her office and stared at the comm. Her heart was racing. She couldn't do this, not again, not after their father…Not Kath.

She took a deep breath. "Computer, relay message from Gretchen Janeway to this console."

Her mother's face appeared on the screen, and it was all Phoebe could do to keep herself upright. "Mom…no…"

Gretchen Janeway's face was swollen and tear streaked, her eyes red and her heartbreak screaming from her eyes. Her face crumpled as she saw her youngest daughter. "Phoebe," she sobbed. "Oh, honey…"

"Not Kathryn, Mom. Please don't tell me it was Kathryn."

"Her ship is lost, Phoebe. Gone. Starfleet Command thinks…" Gretchen put a hand to her chest in agony. "They think Voyager was destroyed in an area of space called the badlands."

A sob escaped from Phoebe as she clutched the back of a chair. "Oh, God."

"Please come home, Phoebe. I can't face this again."

"I'm on my way."

Rowena had been waiting outside with the department chairman, who had been informed by Starfleet that Phoebe would be receiving a call from her mother about the loss of her older sister. They helped Phoebe to his office, where she was beamed through the Starfleet network directly to her mother's kitchen. She materialized and fell right into her mother's arms, both of them weeping.

The months went by, and although there was no sign of Voyager's debris, there was no sign that she had ever returned from the badlands, either. After several years, it was finally officially declared lost. There was a memorial service, yet another one for Gretchen, Phoebe, Paul and Mark, and that was that.

After the memorial service, they were invited back to the Paris' home to grieve together. Kathryn had served with Admiral Paris, and he and Edward Janeway had been good friends. He and his wife and their two daughters were just as lost in their grief as Gretchen and Phoebe, and Mark as well. He had looked like a ghost through the entire ceremony. Phoebe knew he had so many dreams for him and Kathryn. He wanted to have a family with her, grow old with her. When their dog had given birth to her puppies, he had called Phoebe crying. 'She'll never know how sweet they are," he cried softly. "She would have loved them."

Phoebe and Paul, lifelong friends like Kathryn and Mark, had spent a lot of time together since her sister's ship was declared lost. He would listen to her talk about Kathryn when she felt it was too painful to talk to her mother about. "You have no idea how much I laughed when Kathryn came home with her Captain's pips. I just fell over laughing at this tiny little woman, standing there with this authority oozing out of her. I thought she needed to be taken down a peg or two, and believe me, it worked. She just put her hands on her hips, glared at me, and said 'Well, what are you laughing at? What's so funny?' And when I didn't stop, she started whining. 'Mommmmm, Phoebe's being annoying!'" Phoebe giggled. 'I said, well Kathryn, is that what you're going to say when your crew is naughty?"

Paul laughed. "She was a lot different when she had to play Captain."

"She was. I could never reconcile the two of them. There was my big sister, who used to throw me in the pool when it suited her mood, and once dyed all my clothes pink when made fun of her because she couldn't wear pink…She had much redder hair when we were kids. Now it's auburn, almost brown. But it was a real point of contention with her back then. She hated it, and she loved pink but it looked terrible on her. So I would make fun of her because I could wear it, and believe me, that made her mad. Every stitch of clothing in my closet, Paul! And of course, I couldn't just recycle them and replicate new ones. Oh no, my mother made me work for it. She said it served me right, that it was a hurtful thing to say."

"So Kath got away with it?"

"Nah, my mother made her cook for a week, and believe me, Kathryn can't cook. Then we could all eat something different when it turned out horrible, but Kathryn had to eat her own cooking. It was really terrible." She dissolved into giggles again.

Paul shook his head. "You Janeway women are scary."

Phoebe smiled softly. "We pretend to be. That was Kath. She had to be a hard ass captain all the time. But here, she could be herself, with my mom and me, and Mark. She was so vivacious and charming, everyone loved her. She loved to tease me. She loved to tease Mom, too; I think we miss that the most. We miss her fun." Phoebe's smiled faded and she curled up closer to Paul. "I wish she could tease me again." She cleared her throat. "I think…my biggest regret in life is that I wasn't as close with my sister as I could have been. I mean, I know when we were kids, I was her annoying little sister and she was my mean big sister, but we could have fixed that as we got older. The gap between four years narrows as you get older, but Kathryn and I, for some reason, were never able to entirely transverse it. We weren't the way sisters should be."

Paul ran his hand over her hair. "But didn't you once tell me that after your father died, you were the one to make Kathryn snap out of it? That she was wasting away and practically letting herself die, and you made her get out of bed and live her life?"

Phoebe smirked. 'Well, yeah, but she was hardly grateful about it at first. She was pissed that I was constantly on her back. That I wouldn't let her give up."

Paul smiled. "Well, Phoebe, that _is_ the way sisters should be."

* * *

She spoke to Mark just a few minutes after she spoke to Paul about the Romulan incident. She hadn't begrudged him when, about a year ago, he had made the decision to move on with his life and start dating. She knew he couldn't be married to Kathryn's memory forever. It had been years. It had been time for him to move on.

They had a pleasant conversation. "Mark, you and Carla bring Molly by this weekend. You know Mom loves to see her. I wish she had taken one of the puppies."

"I wish she had, too. But I guess with her traveling so much, to see you and to take care of her charities and all that, it would be hard for her to find somewhere to put a dog. I do wish you would have taken Molly though, Phoebe. We love her, but I always feel like she belongs with a Janeway."

"Nah, she belonged to you and Kath. She'd want you to have her." She smiled sadly. "But come over this weekend. All of you."

"We'll be there."

"I'm going to my mom's today, so I'll let her know. See you soon."

"Bye Phoebes."

Phoebe started to clean her office up, and she was ready to go within ten minutes. She took the short walk to the transport station from the university, and then the short walk from the transport station in Bloomington to her mother's.

The first thing she heard when she walked in the door was her mother's sobbing coming from the kitchen. She broke into a panicked run and burst in to see Admiral Paris sitting with Gretchen, holding her hand and attempting to hold back his own tears.

Phoebe's heart jumped into her throat. "What? What happened now?"

Her mother looked up, and to Phoebe's surprise she grinned through her wracking sobs. "Katie's alive!" she almost screamed.

Phoebe felt the floor fall from beneath her, and she landed on her butt. Admiral Paris was immediately standing over her, helping her up to sit at the table. Tears were pouring down her face and she clutched at her mother. They embraced and she found herself falling into sobs as well. It didn't matter how or why at the moment, all that mattered that her big sister, her best friend, was still alive.

They calmed down after a few minutes and Admiral Paris began to tell them what had happened. "Apparently, they were transported to the Delta Quadrant by some sort of…well, the EMH referred to him as the Caretaker. He was a powerful alien with an array that just plucked them from here and put them there. Kathryn destroyed the array to keep it from falling into the hands of a warlike race there, and now they're trying to get home. The Maquis vessel was destroyed, and she merged the two crews into one Starfleet crew."

"I imagine that makes some people over at command a little nervous." Phoebe remarked.

"I won't lie; there are some who are questioning that decision. I'm not one of them. What else could she do, throw them in the brig for seventy years and have them be a drain on resources? Leave them behind? No, this way they are productive members of the crew. The doctor said that initially the merging was very chaotic, that the two crews were at each other's throats all the time, that Commander Chakotay – as he's known now – was constantly challenging her orders. But now, they are, from what the doctor said, one happy family. He said that this Chakotay is a valued first officer for Kathryn, that the two work together as a very successful command team, and that the senior staff is made up of Maquis and Starfleet all working together. Including," Owen cleared his throat. "Including Tom. He's the helm officer."

Gretchen took Owen's hand. "Oh, Owen, you must be so proud of him."

"I'm proud of all of them. For Kathryn to have pulled this off…"He sighed. "But as I said, a lot of people in command are questioning what she's done. The biggest issue seems to be about others whom Kathryn has invited to join the crew. There are a few Delta Quadrant natives, but I think the biggest point of contention among the admiralty right now – aside from the Maquis issue – is the fact that Kathryn has liberated a Borg drone and integrated her into the crew. And this Borg wasn't assimilated recently. This is a human woman who was assimilated as a child and until this year knew nothing but the collective. That's what has Starfleet the most concerned."

"My daughter wouldn't give free reign of that ship to just anyone," Gretchen said stubbornly. "If the drone is part of the crew, there's a good reason for it."

"I understand that, believe me. But Wolf 359 is still fresh in everyone's minds, and now with this Cardassian conflict…The risk of a Borg attack is a very lethal threat at this point. It's lethal at any time, but we quite frankly don't have the resources to be fighting on two fronts. That's what has everyone nervous."

"I think they can relax," Phoebe said wryly. "Kathryn is on the other side of the galaxy with her drone and her Delta Quadrant recruits. Chances are she won't be back-" Phoebe sucked in a breath as she realized the reality of this news. Kathryn was alive, but she was so far away that they might never see her again.

"There are also a lot of questions about her decision to destroy this array. Some are questioning whether it was necessary."

"What?" Gretchen exclaimed. "Necessary? Of course it was necessary! How could they say that-"

"Look, no one is outright saying that she should have allowed another race to succumb to this aggressive race, the doctor called them the Kazon, but a lot of people are wondering why she couldn't have found a way to do it without stranding an Intrepid class starship in another quadrant. They're wondering about the problems that are going to be there now when they come home. And that's when, Gretchen, not if. We will get them home. But now some of the admiralty is worried about the Borg girl. They're worried that they can't just throw the Maquis in prison when they get back. They're going to have to take into account all their actions, their positive contributions to a Starfleet crew, everything. Especially Chakotay. Command wanted him bad, ladies, very bad. They wanted him in prison. Now, it looks like Kathryn will fight when she comes home to keep him out of prison. It will get messy." He sighed. "When they get back. I won't lie. At top speed, it could take decades for them to get back. But if I know your daughter, I know she'll find a shortcut. She'll find a way back."

"I don't care if I don't see her until I'm on my deathbed. As long as I know my Katie's alive, I don't care." Gretchen sniffed. "Is there any way to communicate with them?"

"Yes. We're going to use the same network of relay stations they used to send their EMH to us. I suggest you start composing a letter. One each, not too long. We'll gather them all up, along with as much research as we can to see if there's a way home they don't know about, and send it to them."

"Admiral," Phoebe grinned. 'Is it true the EMH saved a Starfleet ship?"

Owen groaned. 'Don't get me started." He stood. "I've got to get going. My wife and the girls have been crying all day over this. To think we lost our child, and now to know that not only is he alive, but he seems to have cleaned up his act…it has been emotional. I have to get home to them. Oh, by the way Phoebe, call Mark and let him know."

Phoebe nodded as her mother escorted Owen out. Mark. Ouch. Poor Kath.

* * *

It had been difficult for them to compose letters to Kathryn. She knew Mark was having a difficult time, and she didn't envy him his position. But he really loved Carla, and she knew that they belonged together. She had told him that if she knew her sister – and she was pretty sure she did – then she knew that Kath would want Mark to be happy and have someone to share his life with. "Just write from the heart," she told him when she went to deliver the news to him in person. He just stared at him, still in shock.

"From the heart? Phoebe, I gave up on her! How is she ever going to forgive me for that?"

"How do you know she hasn't given up on you?" Phoebe demanded. "Don't beat yourself up, Mark. She's been out there for four years. She's a beautiful woman who has needs. Chances are you didn't wait for you. Especially with that hunky first officer of hers."

Mark narrowed his eyes at her in mock exasperation. "Gee, thanks Phoebes. Great pep talk. Hunky first officer?"

"I had Paul forward me his service record. He had just found out about it a few minutes before I called him. He was still in shock; otherwise I don't think he would have so readily complied."

"Why did you want his service record?"

"Because I wanted to know why my sister would take on the Maquis she was supposed to arrest as her first officer. It doesn't sound like Kath. You know how she felt about the Maquis. I can understand integrating the crews, but I can't see her making any of them bridge officers. So I wanted to see what Starfleet had to say about him. I wasn't aware he had an actual service record. But that's what Paul sent me, even though I requested an intelligence file."

Mark snorted and got up to get them drinks. "No matter how distracted he was, or how much he loves you, Paul is a Starfleet officer. He would never give you an intelligence file. You're lucky you got his service record." He placed a two glasses on the table. Phoebe smiled gratefully and took a sip of the sweet tea.

"Well, it was enlightening, nonetheless. He was actually an officer in Starfleet. Kathryn hadn't mentioned that, but I guess there was a lot about the mission that she couldn't mention. And he is hot, Mark. He is gorgeous. There's no way she'd be able to resist that body, next to her day in day out, sharing close space with her for the past three years. Sorry Mark, you're ancient history."

Mark grinned. "Thanks for trying to make this easier for me, Phoebes, but we both know Kathryn better than that."

Phoebe sighed. "I know. I bet she's lived the life of a Tibetan monk, staying true to your memory. And avoiding the first officer hotness." She reached over and took Mark's hand. "But she would want you to be happy, you need to remember that. Chances are she's been using you as a safety net to avoid forming any romantic attachments to anyone. So let her go. It'll upset her, but it will also free her. Trust me."

* * *

She didn't know what mark had ended up writing, but she knew she was having a great measure of difficulty. Her mother had finished her letter and transmitted it to Owen. Phoebe wondered what her mother had written to her firstborn, to the daughter she had mourned.

She came home from a long day of classes determined to finish the letter. She knew Starfleet planned to transmit in three days. But what did one say to a sister she might never see again?

Phoebe sighed and sat on her sofa. Paul had offered to help her, but she knew she had to do this alone. And she knew it had to be written, so to speak. She wanted her sister to hear her voice, to hear the emotion behind her words. But Starfleet had been adamant that the letters could only be text. They weren't sure how big of a data block could get through the relay network, and they needed to compress it as much as possible. She understood that, but she still wished Kathryn could here her.

"Okay," she said, sitting down at her console. "Computer, begin letter to Kathryn Janeway."

The computer chirped. Phoebe took a deep breath and began to speak.

"Dear Kathryn," she whispered, then cleared her throat and spoke louder. "I can't tell you what it meant to me to learn you were alive. The thought of never seeing you again, hearing your voice, or just being in your presence was more than we could bear. I can't properly describe the crushing pain of thinking I had lost my big sister. And even though the chances are I may never actually see you again, it is enough to know you are alive and working towards coming home. But I miss you, Kath. Thousands of images of our childhood run through my mind on a daily basis. So much reminds me of you. Please be safe, don't be stubborn and take unnecessary chances." She grinned wickedly. "Although, I did have the opportunity to review your first officers record, and it looks as though he may be the type of man to keep you in your place. I certainly hope so, and I certainly am envious if that is the case. I think you know what I mean, dear sister." Her smile faded. "Godspeed to you, Kathryn. Be quick I coming home. I love you, more than anything. With much love, Phoebe."

* * *

The invitation to dine at the Paris' was common enough, but Phoebe couldn't help feeling there was something else behind it, and she said so to her husband as they were getting ready.

"You're too suspicious," Paul said mildly as he pulled his sweater on. "We eat dinner there several times a month. This is no different."

"Oh really? Then why is Deanna Trio going to be there?"

"How do you know that?"

Phoebe placed her brush on the dresser and turned to him, placing her hands on her hips. Paul smirked momentarily, wondering if she knew how much she looked like Kathryn when she did that. "My mother told me. She said Deanna and a Lieutenant Barclay are going to be there. This doesn't sound like an average casual dinner Paul." She grimaces and rubbed her lower back. "Ugh."

Paul looked over at her and smiled sympathetically. "Your back hurts again, huh? You want me to get the-"

"No, I want to get dressed and get out of here. This isn't just a casual dinner, and I'm going to prove it to you."

"We were told to dress casually. To me, that suggests a _casual_ dinner. Your mother also said that Kathleen and Moira were going to be there with their families. To me, that suggests a _family_ dinner. A _casual, family dinner_," he said, raising an eyebrow at her.

She rolled her eyes. "I think it's about Voyager."

Paul groaned. "You think everything is about Voyager. Honey, you know they're doing what they can. The Pathfinder project…" Paul trailed off, his eyes widening.

"What?" Phoebe demanded.

"Well, I don't want to get your hopes up…but I just remembered that Barclay is assigned to the pathfinder project."

Her eyes widened. "Really? Oh, my God. I was right, I knew it."

"Don't jump to conclusions."

"Do you have any idea what it did to us when that relay network failed? Of course you know, you were there! I want to talk to my sister, Paul. I haven't heard a word about Voyager in almost two years. I haven't even talked to Kathryn in six. I need it, my mother needs it, and the families of the crew need it. I don't know why that network stopped working, but it was the worst thing that happened to all of us." She sighed. "We don't even know for sure that Voyager got the data block. We don't know for sure that they're still on their way home."

Paul came over and pulled her to him. In the year that they had been married, he had been even more of a rock to her. Whenever thoughts of her sister got to be too painful, whenever she needed to be reassured abut Kathryn, Paul was there for her. She couldn't believe how lucky she was, and she wanted Kathryn to know about it.

"We'll find out tonight if there is any new information. But like I said, I don't want you to get your hopes up."

"I know," she whispered, then pulled back from him and looked down. "I just want the baby to know her. And I want her to know about it."

Paul ran a hand over her slight bulge. "I do too, honey. I hope we find a way to communicate with them."

"Well, let's get going. The sooner we get there, the sooner we find out."

* * *

Gretchen was already there, in deep conversation with Admiral Paris' wife Julia. Kathleen and Moira and their husbands were there, and Phoebe was pleased to see that Kathleen had brought her daughter. They were introduced to Lieutenant Barclay, who turned out to be a nervous looking man, and exchanged pleasant greetings with Deanna Troi, whom Paul and Phoebe had known for years. There was also a Commander Harkins there, who mentioned that his wife was unable to make it but send her regards to the Janeway family.

They ate dinner, a pleasant meal full of upbeat conversation. She noticed Barclay staring at her a lot, and finally she caught his eye and raised his eyebrow. He smiled nervously.

"I apologize for staring, Professor Janeway. It's just that you bear a remarkable resemblance to your sister."

"So I've been told." Phoebe grinned. "I'm much more irrepressible, though."

"That's what I hear," Gretchen said.

"Have you met my sister, Lieutenant?"

Barclay and Harkins exchanged a glance. "Not in person, no. However…" Barclay cleared his throat and glanced toward Owen. "With your permission, Admiral?"

Owen nodded somberly, and took his wife's hand.

Reg stood up and cleared his throat again. Everyone was looking at him with curiosity. "As you all know, we have been working at the Pathfinder lab trying to find a way to communicate with Voyager. Although it's not public knowledge, and not even widely known in Starfleet yet, Admiral Paris had authorized me to tell you all that today, we made contact with Voyager. We spoke directly…" he leveled his gaze at the Janeways. "We spoke directly with Captain Janeway."

Phoebe felt tears come to her eyes and he saw her mother raise a hand to her heart in surprise. Kathleen and Moira appeared to not have been informed about it either, and they, too, looked about ready to cry.

"Is Tom okay, Dad?" Moira asked softly.

"He's more than ok. So is Kathryn. In fact, this time we had a stroke of luck. A huge stroke of luck, which may make it easier for us to formulate a plan for Voyager. Kathryn was able to transmit the entirety of the ships logs. Every crewmember, every event, every moment of the last six years accounted for. And…this isn't a one time thing."

Gretchen gasped. "What do you mean?"

"We-we-we are able to communicate with Voyager once a month." Reginald said, still nervous. "If all goes well, that is. We're hopeful to be able to transmit once each way once a month, for the time being. We've already begun planning for a data b-block to be sent next month, in response to the information we received from Captain Janeway."

"Are you saying I'll be able to hear my daughter's logs? I'll be able to hear my daughter's voice?" Gretchen asked, her voice trembling.

"Yes." Owen glanced at Reg. 'In fact, if you want, you can hear the transmission we received from her today. It's still classified, but I'm willing to make an exception tonight."

"Yes! Play it!" Phoebe exclaimed, feeling the overwhelming desperation to hear Kathryn.

"Reg?"

Reg walked over to a console and inserted an isolinear chip. All of a sudden, Kathryn's voice came over, staticky, but strong.

"Starfleet Command, this is Captain Kathryn Janeway. Do you read me?"

Phoebe placed a hand to her mouth in shock, and Paul wrapped a comforting arm around her. It was Kathryn, desperation in her voice, but alive. Alive!

"Captain…this is…Lietnentant Reginald Barclay, at Starfleet Command."

There was a pause. "It's good to hear your voice, Leitnenant. We've been waiting a long time for this moment," Kathryn's words came over the speaker, through thousands of light years, heavy with emotion.

"The feeling is mutual. Ufortunately, the micro wormhole is collapsing. We have only a few moments."

"Understood," Kathryn was all business again. "We're transmitting our ships logs, crew reports, and navigational records to you now."

"Acknowledged. And we're sending you data on some new hyper subspace technology," Barclay said, his voice now confident and strong. "We're hoping eventually to use it to keep in regular contact. And we're included some recommended modifications for your comm system."

"We'll implement them as soon as possible."

"Um…" His voice faltered now. There's someone else here who'd also like to say something."

Another pause. "This is Admiral Paris."

"Hello, sir." Kathryn said softly.

"How are your people holding up?"

"Very well. They're an exemplary crew. Your son included."

"Tell him…tell him I miss him. And I'm proud of him."

"He heard you Admiral."

"The wormhole…is collapsing," Barclay's voice was faint.

"I want you all to know we're doing everything we can to bring you home," Owen said.

"We appreciate it, sir. Keep a docking bay open for us," She said, her voice choked. "We hope to-" The recording cut off with a burst of static, then silence.

"That was the end of the transmission." Barclay said softly, pulling the chip out of the console.

They had all listened to the transmission in silence. Phoebe could feel Commander Troi's eyes on her, and she knew the Betazed was gauging her emotional response. She didn't care. This was one of the happiest days in the past six years.

Gretchen had managed to hold herself together until she heard Kathryn say, in a clearly choked voice, "Keep a docking bay open for us!" Then she put her head in her hands and cried silently.

There was silence until Phoebe cleared her throat. "Who was responsible for doing this?"

Deanna spoke up. "Actually, it was Reg who insisted on using the Midas Array to contact Voyager. It was a long shot, but his instinct was right on target. He wouldn't rest until Voyager was contacted."

Phoebe stood up and walked over to the slim man who was still standing nervously by the console. She grabbed him and pulled him to her in a tight hug. "Thank you," she whispered through her tears. 'Thank you for giving me my sister back."

* * *

Phoebe and her mother were sent a good chunk of Kathryn's log. Of course, there were plenty that still had to be processed through Starfleet Intelligence before they could be declassified, but they were grateful for what they got. It was gratifying to reconnect with Kathryn, even if for the moment, it was a one sided connection.

They learned a lot about who she had become out there, and Phoebe knew her mother was sad that Kathryn seemed, little by little, to have been replaced by the Captain. Phoebe was especially disappointed that the fierce connection which initially seemed to speak from Kathryn's logs between her and her first officer seemed to have tempered itself into a strong friendship, nothing more. From all accounts, Kathryn did indeed appear to have lived the live of a Tibetan monk.

The one ray of light for Phoebe was a time period during their second year in the Delta Quadrant. Kathryn and this Chakotay had been stranded on a planet together, alone, for almost two months. Phoebe itched to talk to Kathryn about it, about what wasn't in her logs. And Phoebe was sure that something wasn't mentioned. She didn't know what, but she did know her sister.

Except, she thought as she listened to the more recent logs, maybe she didn't know her so well anymore. This woman, this Captain Janeway who had been forced to hold a community together for six years, she wasn't the sister Phoebe remembered. She knew her mother felt the same way, but Gretchen had refused to discuss it. "She's alive," she said stoically. "That's all that matters. When she comes home, she'll be free to be herself again."

"She sounds like a stranger."

"Not entirely." Gretchen smiled. 'I still hear some of that Kathryn Janeway spirit in there, honey. She just has…well, Phoebe she has more responsibility than we could ever imagine. She hasn't been able to forget that for one day in all these years. And you know how she makes herself suffer, how she makes herself stand alone. Once she gets home, she'll be able to decompress from it."

"Yeah, if she comes home soon. What if she has to spend six more years? Twenty? Thirty?" Phoebe, whose emotions were even more scattered due to her pregnancy, sniffled. "There won't be anything left of the Kathryn we knew."

Gretchen hugged Phoebe close to her. "Don't worry about her Phoebe. You know Kathryn. She'll be okay. What we have to concentrate on now is what to include in that data stream. Keep in mind, anything we send, she'll be able to respond to. Isn't that exciting?"

"It is. I can't wait to tell her about Paul and the baby."

"She'll be so happy for you." Gretchen hesitated, and then frowned. "Don't tell her about mark and Carla's baby, though. Let him do that."

"I wasn't going to. If he decides to send her a message about it, he will."

* * *

"Real time communication?" Phoebe stared at her mother on the view screen with her mouth wide open. "Are you serious?"

"Completely. Owen informed me about it today."

Phoebe juggled the slight weight of her daughter as she felt her start to squirm. "Well, when can we talk to her?"

Gretchen glared. "Well, of course, your sister, being who she is, elected to take the last block of time. The window is only open for eleven minute a day, which means each crew member only has three minutes each. There's over a hundred and forty crew members on board to get through, and as captain, Kathryn feels she should go last."

Phoebe snorted. "Why does that not surprise me?"

"But we'll still have the data stream."

Phoebe grinned; the data stream had indeed been a Godsend. The first personal letter she had received from Kathryn had been like the Holy Grail to her. In the year since, the sisters had kept up a steady stream of letters. Kathryn had been thrilled to hear about Regina Kathryn being born, and was somewhat surprised to hear that Phoebe had married Paul. "I suppose I should have seen it coming," Kathryn had said, grinning out at her from the viewscreen. "For a woman who was adamant about never having anything to do with Starfleet, it's only fair that you would marry a Starfleet officer."

Phoebe had heard the teasing in that, and she had immediately retaliated with an irritating, wheedling letter probing into Kathryn's relationship with Chakotay, which was countered with a dry, tongue in cheek account of all the times the two of them had fought viciously over a command decision. "Suffice it to say, we have butted heads through the years, but he is my dearest friend." Phoebe could hear the emphasis in the words 'dearest friend'. She found it highly amusing, and she knew that Kathryn was just fooling herself.

"Just wait until you get home, dear sister," she muttered as she composed a response to that. "Just you wait."

Phoebe had even taken it upon herself to send a letter to Chakotay, introducing herself and thanking him for being there for Kathryn all these years. It was completely innocent, but Gretchen and Paul had both known the way Phoebe worked, and they had all laughed together on what Kathryn's reaction would be when she found out.

A scathing letter from Kathryn followed that one up, and Phoebe was thrilled to see that it was more like her big sister that any letter she had received thus far. It was Kathryn in full on 'big sister' mode, and Phoebe and Gretchen had quite a laugh over it. It was sent in the same data stream as a response letter from Chakotay, who struck Phoebe as a kind, sensitive, intelligent man who was fiercely loyal and devoted to her sister's well being. Her eyes lit up as she saw him mention he had a sister who was currently in Arizona.

She went to visit Sekaya, and the two women had a god long talk about their respective siblings. Sekaya had been enthralled with little Regina. "Regina Kathryn is a beautiful name."

"I named her after two very important people." She smiled at the picture of Sekaya holding the baby, and wished she had a holo-imager so she could send a picture to Kathryn and Chakotay. "Regina for Reg Barclay, who never gave up on finding Voyager. He just about fainted dead away when I told him that, by the way. And Kathryn, of course, for my sister. I knew she wouldn't like it if I named the baby Kathryn, so I used it as her middle name."

"It is a strong name." They both looked up as their mothers walked out of the house, where they had been deep in conversation for well over and hour. Phoebe smiled when she saw a holo-imager in her mother's hands.

Chakotay had sent her a letter of gratitude of the picture of his sister with the baby. Kathryn had sent another diatribe.

"I know what you're doing, Phoebe, and I would suggest you stop right now. Right now!" Kathryn leaned forward and glared at her far off sister. "If you're extremely lucky we won't make it home for thirty years and you'll have plenty of time to hide from me. But I could be home any day now, and I'd hate to have to make Regina half an orphan."

Phoebe had just laughed. Kathryn thought she knew what she was doing, but not really. What she was really doing was trying to keep Kathryn at the forefront as much as possible. Dealing with an irritating younger sister was a job for Kathryn, not the Captain.

The day came for Gretchen and Phoebe to receive their transmission from Kathryn. Phoebe was incredibly nervous. She changed her outfit ten times, changed the baby's outfit at least twenty, and kept calling Paul to make sure he would be home in time. The three of them transported to her mother's, and they waited impatiently for Starfleet to route the transmission.

Finally, the comm chimed. Gretchen opened the channel to see Reg's beaming face. "Are you ready?"

Gretchen nodded anxiously. For the first time in almost seven years, she would be talking to her daughter face to face, more or less.

"I'm sending you the transmission. Here she is."

Suddenly, there was Kathryn's face. Phoebe had seen pictures of her of course, but she hadn't seen her in person so the changes were more obvious now. Her hair, once so long and thick, was now cut short just above her shoulders. Phoebe supposed it was easier for her, especially during battles. But still, it made her sad. Kathryn's hair had been her one vanity. In a way Phoebe felt like she had cut it to make herself less feminine and therefore more authoritative to whoever they might meet out there.

She was clad in the old Starfleet uniforms, standing straight up, her lips pressed tightly together. To a casual observer, she looked almost irritated. But Phoebe and Gretchen knew that Kathryn – no, the Captain – was trying not to cry.

"Mom, Phoebe, Paul." She finally smiled, a tremulous smile that indicated her emotional state. "I'm so glad to finally talk to you."

Phoebe assumed there was a crewmember present working the communications, and that was why Kathryn was reigning in her emotions. Lucky for Phoebe, she had no such problem. She promptly burst into tears.

"Oh, Phoebes," Kathryn said softly. Gretchen and Paul both hugged Phoebe close.

Phoebe held Regina up higher, trying to get a hold on her tears. "Kathryn, this is your niece, Regina." She managed to choke out. Regina stared at the screen, her curiosity piqued by this new face.

Kathryn's mouth spread open into her beautiful smile. "Oh, my God, Phoebe. She's beautiful. Hi," she waved at the baby, who babbled something and blew a spit bubble.

"I think she likes you," Paul said, grinning.

"Honey, how are you doing? Are you okay?" Gretchen asked.

"I'm as well as can be expected. We just had a mild situation here recently with the Doctor…Have you heard of this new holo program, Photons, Be Free?"

"I have." Paul said. "I've actually run it. It…portrays you in an interesting light, Kathryn."

Kathryn rolled her eyes. "I hope no one actually takes that seriously."

"Well, we don't, and our opinions are all that matter. " Phoebe said.

Kathryn laughed.

"I have to say, Kath, you don't look that much older." Phoebe said, grinning.

"Gee, thanks."

"You're still so beautiful."

Kathryn laughed. "Did you expect I would look hideous?"

"No, but I expected you to look a lot older for your experiences. But you don't, not really."

"What's your secret, and can I have it?" Gretchen quipped.

Kathryn laughed. "Actually, keeping my sanity is my secret. Which reminds me," she gestured to someone out of view, and Commander Chakotay stepped in to Kathryn's left. "Phoebe, meet your pen-pal."

Phoebe appraised him. He was even hotter than in his pictures, she thought. "Commander, a pleasure to finally meet you. How have you held up having to deal with her all these years?"

He laughed. "We deal with each other equally, Professor. Sometimes neither one of us is a picnic, but we make a good team."

"Neither one of us is a picnic?" Kathryn put her hands on her hips and looked up at him. "I beg your pardon, Commander, but I am an absolute delight at all times."

He winked at Phoebe. 'Of course, Captain. That's what I meant."

"Professor, Mrs. Janeway, Commander Farrow, it's a pleasure to finally meet you all."

"That's Phoebe, Gretchen and Paul to you, Commander." Gretchen said sweetly. "Anyone having to serve as Kathryn's XO for seven years straight has earned the right to be on a first name basis with her family."

"Mother!"

Gretchen grinned. Then her expression sobered. "Chakotay I want to thank you for supporting Kathryn all these years. This couldn't have been easy for anyone on Voyager, but I know it was most especially difficult on the command team. I remember from my husband's days as Captain that having a first officer you can trust and count on is absolutely necessary to make a mission successful, and I'm glad to see Kathryn has that in you."

"Thank you…Gretchen. That means a lot to me. I also want to thank you for visiting with my mother and sister. It was hard on them, these last seven years. Your visit meant a lot to them."

"We quite enjoyed it. We have plans to see them this weekend." Gretchen focused her attention on her daughter. "We miss you terribly, Kathryn. I can't even put into words what losing you felt like. Seeing you, standing there alive and healthy, no matter how far away you are, has lifted my spirits more than you could ever know. We love you, honey."

Kathryn seemed to be struggling with her calm control. "I love you too. And I miss you all so much. Phoebe, tell her all about me, ok? Make sure she knows who I am when I get back." Kathryn smiled. "We'll be able to speak again in a few weeks, okay?"

"We look forward to it. We love you, Katie. Commander, keep an eye on her." Gretchen joked.

"Will do," he grinned.

"Until next time," Kathryn said softly. She held their gaze a moment more, and then turned away. "Okay, Seven."

The transmission ended. They sat there in silence.

* * *

There were a few more transmissions which didn't hold as much of the emotional resonance as the first one. It became routine, and they had happy, chatty conversations in the brief time they had. They weren't able to speak to Chakotay again after that, but they did meet the Borg drone, Seven of Nine, whom Kathryn had liberated from the Collective. They found her to be somewhat unsure of herself, and endearing in that quality. Gretchen had insisted that Seven visit with them went they retuned to Earth. Whenever that might be.

A few conversations with Owen revealed that Tom had married one of the former Maquis, B'Elanna Torres, and that they were expecting a baby. "We had a nice chat," he said one night when both families were having dinner together.

"She's quite lovely," Julia said happily. "And they look very happy together. They said the baby is a girl, and they're looking towards naming her Miral, after B'Elanna's mother."

"She may have passed away in the last few years. I find it says a lot about B'Elanna's character that she would honor her mother in that way." Owen said with pride. "I already consider her a daughter, and I can't wait to meet her someday."

"In thirty years," Julia said wryly.

"Honey, come on. Look at how far they've come already! They should still have sixty years left to go. I think we'll be seeing Voyager sooner rather than later."

Julia rolled her eyes at Gretchen and Phoebe. "Ever since he found out about the baby, he's been chipper like this." She said, smiling.

"Tom's first child, Julia! Quite an occasion."

"I understand that there's already a child on Voyager. Kathryn has mentioned her a few times." Gretchen said.

"Yes, Naomi Wildman. Poor kid, never having seen her father, being born decades from home."

"Actually, according to Kath, she's very well adjusted." Phoebe said. "And very bright. Kath said she's looking forward to Tom's baby. She wants to help baby-sit."

"That's adorable!" Julia gushed. Phoebe and Gretchen exchanged amused glances. For all her talk of Owen's good mood, she was just as susceptible to babies and children.

* * *

It came as a shock. Completely out of nowhere.

She had been in the garden with Regina. Almost a year old, Regina was sitting up happily tossing dirt around and giggling. Phoebe didn't mind, she had to bathe her in a little while anyway. They had a benefit at the university that night, and Regina would be accompanying them. It was her first 'night out', and Phoebe had replicated an adorable little outfit for the occasion.

She was startled to hear the whir a transporter beam from behind her. She picked up Regina and whirled around as she saw Paul materialize. He looked stunned.

"Oh, no," she whispered. Her mind immediately flashed to Voyager. Had something happened? Had the ship been destroyed? Was Kathryn dead?

"Paul?" she asked softly, her voice trembling.

He rushed to her side and grasped her shoulder. There was something in his eyes, tears, but not sadness. "They're home," he said hoarsely. "_They're home_!"

Phoebe felt her knees buckle, and Paul had to hold her up and guide her to a bench. He took Regina from her and they sat down, Phoebe trembling and pale. "What happened? When? How?" she started to cry, the cried turning to sobs before he could even answer her questions. "Are you sure? _Are you sure_?" she cried, clutching his uniform.

"Positive. They're en route to Earth right now."

She broke down completely, lowering her head until it was practically in her lap. Sobs wracked her body as Paul ran a comforting hand up and down her back. The stress and terror and unbearable sadness of the past seven years erupted from her, and she made no reaction at all when a second transporter beam deposited her equally hysterical mother a few feet away from her.

Gretchen flew over to Phoebe and the two women clutched at each other, sobbing, as they had seven years before. Only this time, it wasn't for the loss of their Kathryn. It was for her return.

The whole sector was abuzz with the news of Voyager's return. Phoebe and Gretchen had more messages logged on their consoles than they had in years. Neighbors and colleagues dropped by to offer congratulations. The press tried to get interviews. Gretchen sequestered herself at Phoebe's house, and they waited until they could see Kathryn.

Paul had to go back to Headquarters, which was in an uproar over the situation. Evidently, Voyager had returned through a Borg transwarp conduit which had also deposited a Borg sphere right in sector 001. Voyager had destroyed the sphere, but there was a lot of classified nonsense going on that had to be dealt with before the crew could be released from the ship.

Finally, after what seemed forever, Paul informed them of the Starfleet banquet to be held. The debriefings were over, and the crew was free to reunite with their families.

They waited in the great hall at headquarters, hundreds of people waiting to see those they had been missing for seven long years. Suddenly, transporter beams began shooting down into the open space in front of the crowd. The first ones to get beamed down was the command team, appearing together, united. Kathryn and Chakotay, upright at attention, in full dress uniform. For a nanosecond, the crowd just stared, and then released a roar of applause that echoed like thunder throughout the hall.

Gretchen and Phoebe left Paul holding Regina, the applause continuing as more and more of Voyager's crew were beamed down. They lost sight of Kathryn as families began reuniting, friends found friends, cries of happiness bounced out of the crowd. They pushed their way through to see her surrounded by the Paris family, and Phoebe heard herself shout her sister's name a few brief seconds before all three women were in each other's arms.

She could feel her mother's shoulders shaking with silent sobs, and it was all she could do to control her own tears. She knew Kathryn would be, considering she was in uniform. Phoebe relished the feel of her sister in her arms, realizing at that moment that she had never really expected to see Kathryn ever again.

They were like that for who knew how long, just holding each other, hearing the other reunions around them. Finally, they pulled away from each other and stared at each other. Kathryn's cheeks were wet, her eyes filled with tears, her mouth trembling. Gretchen took her daughter's face in her hands and just looked, drinking in the sight of her. Silently, they each took one of her hands and guided her to where Paul stood with Regina.

Again, an emotional reunion, as Kathryn met her tiny niece. She held the baby in her arms, her eyes closed, tears streaming from beneath her lids. Regina immediately clung to Kathryn's neck, and they stayed like that for several minutes. When Kathryn opened her eyes, Phoebe could see that the Captain hadn't won, after all.

* * *

"Come on, Admiral," Phoebe wheedled. "Tell me, tell me, tell me!"

Kathryn idly ran her hand through the water, her sunglasses blocking Phoebe's view of her eyes. "Leave me alone." She said languidly.

The two sisters were lying on floats in Phoebe's pool. Gretchen was inside with Regina, giving the sister's some much needed sibling bonding.

"I'm not going to, and you know it. What happened with the hottie out there?"

"I'm not sure Commander Chakotay would respond well to being called 'the hottie'," Kathryn said mildly.

"He would if you said it."

Kathryn sighed. 'I've told you a million times. Chakotay was my closest friend out there. He had to be. We are still close friends. I was his commanding officer. He started dating my protégé. That is all the information there is, and that is all the information that is needed."

"He's not dating Seven anymore," Phoebe pointed out.

"Doesn't matter," Kathryn shifted on the float. "We are friends, that's all."

"You're fooling yourself if you think that. I've seen the way you too look at each other."

"I have more important things to worry about right now than the way me and my former first officer look at each other, Phoebe," Kathryn murmured.

"You went on that little trip with him, didn't you? Just the two of you, alone for days together, on a shuttle," Phoebe teased. "Come ooonnn, Kath, tell Phoebe."

"That was a highly personal trip for Chakotay. A way to face his demons. The massacre at Tevlik disturbed him greatly and he needed closure."

"Have you seen him lately?"

She shrugged. "I see him often enough. I've been spending a lot of time with the Johnson's though."

Phoebe made a face. "Kathryn, spending time with your ex-fiancé, his wife and their son, adorable as he is, is no substitute for getting it on with your hunky first officer." Phoebe let out a huff of frustration. "You disappoint me."

Kathryn smiled, her face still turned up to the sun. "So sorry. But you're right, Kevin is adorable."

"Don't change the subject."

"There is no subject, so I'm not changing anything. You're seeing what you want to see, Phoebe. But there's nothing to see."

Phoebe regarded her sister. 'You're wrong," she said quietly. "And one day, you're gonna let your guard down, and I'm going to be there to say I told you so."

Kathryn smirked. "We'll see."

Phoebe smiled softly and leaned back on her float, flipping her sunglasses back over her eyes. "Oh yes, we will." She looked over at Kathryn again. "But I am glad to have you home, Kathryn. You have no idea." She hesitated. "I hope that now…Well, I hope we can be closer. The way sisters are supposed to be."

Kathryn raised an eyebrow and smiled over at her sister. "But we always have been, Phoebes. We fight the way sisters do, but you've always been my best friend. That never changed, even over seven years and seventy-thousand light years." Then, she echoed what Phoebe's own husband had said all those years ago, when she thought Kathryn was lost forever. 'You never gave up on me, Phoebes. And that's the way sisters should be."

The End…For now.

Like it? Hate it? Want it fixed? Let me know, I really want to write a sequel, and I'd love suggestions for it. Possibly about Phoebe's views on the hopefully developing relationship between Kathryn and Chakotay? The further development of her relationship with Kathryn? Let me know!


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